When it comes to innovation, the American mobile handset industry sits somewhere between Australopithecus and George “The Animal” Steele in the evolutionary metaphor. Sure, Qualcomm invented CDMA (sheh-sheh, Cap’n) but that’s an air interface technology and generally not likely to make consumers quiver in their knickers over the next slinky bit of hardware to come wriggling out of the pipe.
This is why, lately, I’ve cozied up to LG and Samsung. My very first cell phone was a Samsung SCH-1500 on Sprint prepaid, and though I can’t say that the experience approximated anything other than jamming an eight-inch serving fork into my groin, I do have a fondness for nostalgia. (To be fair, the 1500’s problems had more to do with Sprint’s then-spotty coverage in South Florida than anything else.) If I could, I’d project myself way back to the halcyon days of 1998 and revisit the Radio Shack in the Galleria Mall and gleefully bitchslap the nattering douchenozzle who pitched me a dual-band phone for use on a single-band network, unabashedly touting its dual-bandedness as a feature. But whatever. If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have thought the XFL was a great investment opportunity.
Where the Korean handset manufacturers shine is in their delivery of equipment that appeals to more than just headstrong practicality. The new LG Flare for Virgin Mobile (also of Sprint, as its mild-mannered alter ego, the LX-160) will set you back a scant $30, yet it’s as visually and aesthetically appealing as it is functional; from the thin silver band that traces its way around the front of the flip, to the tight rubbery keypad, to the vibrant screen and the smoky window that obscures the external display when not in use, the Flare is hardly pretentious, yet manages to please simply through thoughtful design and flawless implementation.
The Samsung Hue, otherwise known as the SCH-R500, is a mid-range handset that effortlessly pulls off every trick that leaves the V3a and its CDMA predecessors (the V3c and the V3m) writhing on the concrete like Nancy Kerrigan. A dynamite main screen, a legible and useful external screen, clear voice, no glaring glitches, and once again, an appealing design that indicates it might have, at some point during its development, come in contact with at least one phone-using human being. Too bad mine is tied to one particularly slack-jawed, mumbling-to-itself-on-the-subway network which shall remain nameless. (Cough-NotCricket-cough).
Ahem.
Which is not to say that Korean phones have always been without their share of problems. Reception issues come immediately to mind, more specifically among their GSM offerings, but even these have seemingly gone the way of good movies and common sense, which proves that many people are willing to trade at least a couple of degrees of functionality for a tighter hinge, an intuitive interface, and a pretty face.
And speaking of pretty faces, William “George the Animal” Myers has a master’s degree from Central Michigan University. Not just another hairy back, that guy.
